Questions & Answers
FAQ: Frequently Asked Questions & Their Answers
What geographic areas do you perform weddings in? I perform ceremonies in Bucks,Carbon, Lehigh,
Where do you perform ceremonies? I perform ceremonies in hotels, reception halls, country clubs, parks, and in private homes. Outdoors or indoors, it is your choice!
How do we create a ceremony with you? I encourage couples to make their ceremony their own. I encourage couples to include loved ones in their ceremony. I welcome the participation of your children. Do you want a friend to read? Do you want to remember a loved one who has passed away? Do you want to write your own vows?
Once a couple decides to work with me, I share with them a wedding ceremony planner. Included in this planner are options for all sorts of elements and components for a ceremony. This 15+ page document is a beginning, a reference point for our planning process. In addition, we collaborate through routine phone and email contact.
We don't belong to a church and would like to be married in one. Can you marry us in a church? I am able to and have performed weddings in churches; however, due to professional courtesy, I do not. Consider the idea of a stranger coming into your home and hosting a party while you are not there. Weddings are 'parties' that, if held in a church, should be hosted by the pastor of the church. Most traditional churches or houses of worship are available for church members only. Some communities of faith may be willing to rent their facilities. Unitarian Universalist churches and the Religious Society of Friends/ Quaker Meeting Houses may be places for you to contact. Please use a search engine for more information if you wish to pursue this.
What is a civil ceremony and do you perform civil ceremonies? A civil ceremony does not have to incorporate or include any reference to God. A Judge, Justice of the Peace or a Mayor can perform civil ceremonies. I am legally able to 'officiate' or preside at any ceremony. I choose to perform ceremonies that reflect the values of a couple.
What are your fees? My fees to perform a ceremony range from $250 to $400. Ceremonies planned for holiday/ holiday weekends are an additional $50. My fees are similar to other Protestant and Unitarian Universalist clergy. Please refer to Fees & Services for detailed information.
At least one face to face meeting is available for all couples at no cost. The length of your ceremony does not increase or decrease my fee. I am happy to discuss my professional fee with you before you send me a $100 deposit. I do not schedule two ceremonies on the same day. If you are running a few minutes late, I am not going to rush off to another ceremony. Other officiants often schedule more than one ceremony on any given day and therefore, while their fee may be less (or even more) you may have problems if vendors or family members are running late.
Do you charge extra for your participation/ attendance a rehearsal? I charge an additional $100 for a rehearsal held before the day of your ceremony. Some couples choose to rehearse for their ceremony a few hours before 'show time'. Check with your wedding site to see if this is an option. Having a same-day rehearsal means that you will not have to pay this additional fee.
Do you require a deposit? A $100 non-refundable deposit is required to hold your ceremony date. Once I have received your deposit, I will not schedule any other ceremony 'on your date'. This $100 deposit is deducted from your final cost. If you decide to work with me, once we have spoken and confirmed my availability, please send your deposit as soon as possible. This ensures that I am 'yours' for 'your date'. I expect to receive this deposit after our initial contact and confirmation of my availability. Please refer to Fees & Services for detailed information.
If for any reason you need to cancel your ceremony, this $100 deposit is non-refundable. If I am unable to perform your ceremony for any reason, once I have received the deposit, I retain the non-refundable deposit only and return any other monies paid to me.
How can we pay you? Payments can be made in cash, check or through PayPal. I do not accept credit cards. Final payment is due at least one week your ceremony. Please contact me for my PayPal information and with any questions you may have. If a check bounces, I expect you to pay for any additional fees I may incur. Payments can be mailed to Stephanie Thompson,
We would like to meet you in person to help us decide who will perform our ceremony. Will you meet us for an interview? I believe this can helpful for many couples. This initial meeting is complimentary. I will work with you to find a mutually convenient time and location to meet.
How often do we have to meet with you? Do we have to go through pre-marital counseling? Do we meet face to face before the ceremony? I like to meet all of the couples I work with at least once before their big day. One face to face meeting is available at no cost. During this meeting, we get to know one another and spend much of our time 'talking through' the ceremony. I arrange to meet couples in places convenient for them as well as myself. I meet couples in restaurants, coffee shops and in their own homes. I have also met couples at the site of their wedding. (I am able to and have offered pre-marital counseling to couples. This option is available for you, if you feel it would be helpful. However, I do not require this.)
How far in advance should I contact you about my wedding? As you plan your wedding celebration, you should secure an Officiant at your earliest convenience. Without an Officiant and a wedding license, you cannot have a wedding ceremony. You can have a party, but not a legally binding ceremony! When you contact me, I can confirm if I am available for your day. Once I receive a deposit of $100, I am yours for your day; I do not accept any other commitments on your day.
What about a last minute request? I have performed weddings on short notice. If there is room on my calendar, I will perform your ceremony. Be in touch with me as soon as you can and I will let you know if I am available. Weddings planned in 12 months or 3 weeks- all can be beautiful if the celebration reflects the couple.
We are interested in working with you. What happens if we contact you and you are already booked for our wedding date? I do not schedule two weddings on the same day. If your wedding day is already booked, I can make a referral to a number of colleagues who may be available. These colleagues are recommended because they work with you and assist you in creating a personalized ceremony- just like I do.
Can we write our own vows? Yes! Do we have to? No! Writing your own vows is a great way to personalize a ceremony. However, writing vows can be intimidating for some people. And so, I can assist you in choosing vows that reflect your thoughts. I have a selection of vows for you to review. You may also have something in mind already.
What do you wear for the ceremony? I often wear a celebrant's robe, which is similar to an academic robe. My robe is black and I wear a simple white stole over it. Neither the robe nor the stole have any religious symbols upon them. I can also wear a suit or suitable professional clothing. I am sorry I do not dress in costume for theme weddings.
Is a wedding rehearsal necessary? Whether to have a rehearsal is a decision for the Bride and Groom to make, not the event site or family members. A couple needs to reflect on what they need for their ceremony to go smoothly. I charge an additional $100 to attend and participate in a rehearsal held before the day of your ceremony.
Having a rehearsal may be very helpful if you have a large wedding party. If you have a small bridal party (six people or under including the Bride and Groom), in my experience, a rehearsal is not necessary. Rehearsals provide a bridal party with some direction related to their role during a ceremony. Rehearsals can be chaotic if they are not organized. Rehearsals are also another opportunity for family 'drama' to occur. A rehearsal could also prevent any drama on the day of your wedding.
Some couples find it is not necessary for an Officiant to attend the rehearsal if they are working with an experienced Event/ Wedding Planner. Is there someone provided by your reception site? You may not realize it, but, your reception site may include a staff person to 'facilitate' your rehearsal. An Event Planner/ Staff from the reception site can run a rehearsal and provide support to you and to your bridal party.
Do we need wedding programs? Programs are not necessary. Many couples use programs to express words of gratitude, and to inform their guests of who members of the Bridal party are. For example- Best Man, John Smith, Cousin of the Groom. Some programs also serve as a wedding favor. If you are interested in having a program available for guests, I can provide you with the 'right' words to list the components of your ceremony. I can share examples of programs from other ceremonies. I do not provide wedding bulletins or programs.
What is the purpose of having "readings" performed during a wedding ceremony?
Do you have any restrictions on the type of music or readings shared during our ceremony? My hope is that the wedding ceremony reflects the couple. Therefore, I have no restrictions on the use of music or the type of readings shared.
Do you limit the use of flash photography or videography during a ceremony? I have no restrictions on the activities of the photographer or videographer; that is up to you. Many officiants restrict or limit these professionals during the ceremony, but I do not.
Who applies for the marriage license? The couple being married applies for and pays for their wedding license. A license is required from the state where the wedding is performed. I am responsible for its proper signing and returning it to the county where it originated. The license should be requested at least a month before the wedding date. (In
Basic information about getting a wedding license in
(Always check with the local municipality or courthouse for up to date information.)
Legal Age: 18
Blood Test: None
Fees: Varies from County to Country
ID: Valid Photo ID, Proof of Social Security Number
Both Bride and Groom must be present to apply
Where: May apply anywhere in the state
Witnesses: No witnesses are needed, other than an Officiant
Waiting period: 72 hours (Some courts will post date so you can take it with you!)
Valid for: 60 days
If Previously Married: Divorce decree or death certificate required
Basic information about getting a wedding license in
(Always check with the local municipality or courthouse for up to date information.)
Legal Age:18
Blood Test: None
Fees: Must be paid at time of application
ID: Valid Photo ID
Both Bride and Groom must be present to apply
Where: Apply where the Bride lives, if not NJ, then where the Groom lives, if both are out of state then where the wedding will be held.
Witnesses: Two witnesses ( and the Officiant) must sign license on the day of the wedding
Waiting period: 72 hours
Valid for: 30 days
If Previously Married: Divorce decree or death certificate required
You will need to know the name and address of your Officiant when you apply
When do you need our wedding license and what happens with it, once we are married?
I prefer to receive a wedding license on the day of a rehearsal. If I am not attending your rehearsal, or if you are not having a rehearsal, I need to know who will have the license on the day of the ceremony; I will meet the designated person prior to the wedding ceremony, get the license and complete the portion that the couple needs. Image the stress on your wedding day, and all of the details you are managing. If we have already discussed who will have your license, it is one less thing for you to worry about. The groom can have the license, the best man or even the father of the groom. I prefer that the Bride or her parents NOT have the license. It is hectic enough for the Bride in the hour before the ceremony; I do not like to bother her for a license.
I am responsible for signing your license and then mailing it to the appropriate courthouse. I am legally required to file the license. In the
How do I get legal proof that I am married? Once I return the signed marriage license to the appropriate Government Office, you are registered as being married, effective on the date of your ceremony. For example, in
Can you legally perform wedding ceremonies? Yes, I can! I was not ordained just to perform weddings. I did not receive my ordination online. I am ordained by the United Church of Christ. This Protestant denomination is recognized legally within the
For your information, in two Pennsylvania Counties there are two contrasting rulings about marriages performed by persons ordained over the internet.
1- On 9/7/2008, the Court of Common Pleas of York County rendered an opinion that persons ordained over the internet are not persons who may legally marry individuals in the COmmonwealth of Pennsylvania. The case is filed in the office of the Prothonotary of York County to No. 2007-SU-002132-Y08. The opinion should be available from the York County Prothonotary.
2- On 12/3/2008,in a ruling by Judge C. Theodore Fritsch of the Court of COmmon Pleas of Bucks County a marriage performed by an internet ordained minister has been declared valid. The case is filed in the office of the Prothonotary of Bucks County to No. 08-1620-29-1 and the opinion should be available from the Prothonotary's office. , Ceremonies performed by ministers of the
These rulings directly contradict each other that the marriages performed by internet-ordained ministers are valid or invalid. Although these rulings are only binding in their respective counties, the decisions present questions of the validity of marriages performed by ministers ordained on the internet.